There seems to be an epidemic with failed marriages. It’s not only happening in secular circles, but also in Christian ones too.

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I’m not a marriage expert. I only share things based on my own personal observation and experience.

This famous expression holds true, Know Thyself.

One of the reasons why marriages fail is because people rush, instead of taking their time and getting to know themselves first.

If you don’t know who you are, how can you possibly select the right person to spend the rest of your life with?

We bought into the lie Hollywood sold us, falling for an illusion or fantasy of romance and marriage.

We want to be swept off our feet and saved by another person. So, we convince ourselves that when we finally meet someone, we will be happy and fulfilled.

This couldn’t be further from the truth.

Only God can save us, not a person. People can’t give us what we don’t already have inside.

We are in such a rush to hook up with someone and get married that we wind up marrying the wrong person.

I understand that we don’t want to be alone. However, in our desperation, we rush and don’t take the time to analyze whether or not the person is right for us.

Feelings can be deceiving. Those warm and fuzzy feelings pass like gas.

God admonishes us to be patient and exercise wisdom in all things. Being desperate or rushing into anything, especially a marriage, is a huge mistake.

When we get caught up or obsessed in finding a partner, instead of learning who we are and what we want first, we can end up with the wrong person.

Rush, rush, rush… Hurry, hurry, hurry… leads to misery.

So many people are falling in and out of love these days, it’s mind boggling. However, I am realizing why that is, and it’s because people don’t know who they are.

When you don’t know who you are and what you want, your ability to choose the right person is hindered.

People don’t want to do the preliminary work necessary to be with someone or become the right person for their future partner.

We think “love” if the only thing we need. Don’t get me wrong, love is important. However, it’s not everything. There are other factors contingent upon sustaining a long term, healthy and fulfilling marriage.

It all comes down to knowing yourself. If you know and love yourself first, then you have a better chance of finding the right person to marry and not end up disappointed, disillusioned and ultimately, divorced.

Trust me, I’ve been at this for a while now. Do yourself a favor and readjust your focus. Instead of obsessing on marriage, get to know who you are and what you want first. You will save yourself a lot of grief, and hurt in the long run.

Have you taken the time necessary to get to know yourself or heal from your past, instead of focusing on finding someone and getting married?