Tag Archives: Jesus
Like We Don’t Exist
The other day while I was walking to Port Authority after a doctor’s appointment, I noticed a young boy swaying and stumbling under the weight of his huge backpack like if he was drunk.
At a distance, he appeared too young to be walking alone on the streets of Manhattan. I felt a tug and decided I would try to catch up and speak with him.
When I did, I discovered that he was a she, with short dusty brown hair, soft brown eyes, and wearing baggy khaki pants with a matching military jacket which seemed to droop on her 4″11″ frame.
“Hey, thanks a lot,” she said when I slipped her something. She had a beautiful smile even though most of her teeth were missing and her face was covered with sores.
If I were to guess, she was no more than eighteen years old, a transient and addicted to Meth. The sores were from scratching due to formication–which is the sensation of bugs crawling on or underneath the skin–a common side effect of Meth users.
“What’s going on?” I asked. “Everything,” she said with a sigh, looking down and around to avoid making eye contact with me.
“I’m sorry to hear that. I noticed you back there and I’m glad I caught up to you,” I said.
“Really? You noticed me? Wow. No one ever notices me. It’s like I’m invisible or something. Even people I know and thought were my friends, avoid me.” Her voice cracked.
“I know what it’s like to feel invisible,” I said. I could feel my face flush and tears welling up. She searched my eyes. “My name is Whitney,” she said sticking her hand out to shake mine.
Here we were, two strangers, crossing paths, unbearing our souls on the corner of 42nd Street. The heartbeat of New York City. The epicenter of fame and fortune. As we stood there and talked, people rushed around us like we didn’t exist. The irony.
Before we parted ways, she asked if it would be okay to give me a hug. Even though I’m not the hugging type, I said yes. When we hugged, I knew she meant it.
Suffice it to say, this was the most memorable experience I’ve had in a long time. It was real. There were no walls, barriers, masks or pretenses. In contrast to all the years I worked in Corporate America, where pretenses and playing politics were the norm and being real was frowned upon. Go figure.
“Thou blind Pharisee, cleanse first that which is within the cup and platter, that the outside of them may be clean also.” Matthew 23:26
“Do not ye yet understand, that whatsoever entereth in at the mouth goeth into the belly, and is cast out into the draught?
But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man.” Matthew 15:17-18
Posted in addiction, blogging, children, mental illness, writing
Also tagged 42nd Street, Abuse, Backpack, Barriers, Being invisible, Being Real, Broadway, Children, Corporate America, Dismissed, drug addiction, Drugs, Fake, formication, Genuine, Hiking, Homelessness, Hugs, Hypocrisy, Ignored, invisible, Jesus Christ, Love, Masks, Mental Illness, Mentally Ill, Meth, New York City, Phoniness, Politics, Pretense, Runaways, sores, Strangers, Times Square, Transient, Vagabond, Walls, Whitney
2 Comments
Commitment
The dictionary defines commitment as “the state or quality of being dedicated to a cause, activity, etc.”
Through the course of my life, I’ve had trouble committing to things and sticking with losing weight, exercising, writing a book and a host of other things.
Which is why I was petrified when I got married again and became pregnant at 37. Once I crossed over the threshold into motherhood, I signed on to the scariest and biggest commitment of my life. I knew things would change and I was right because it’s been sixteen years now since my free spirit took a back seat.
I would be lying if I told you it’s been easy or that there haven’t been days I wanted to quit. Marriage is hard, parenting is even harder, but raising children with special needs is beyond difficult. Yet and still, I couldn’t imagine life without them. My love supersedes everything and compels me to keep going.
That’s not to say, I don’t miss the years I’ve flitted around like a hummingbird. But I’ve realized that commitment was exactly what I needed most because it forced me to grow up. I’ve since learned that avoiding commitment or responsibility only keeps us stuck, stagnant and stunts our growth and maturity in life and relationships. So I’d rather wrestle with the struggles and hardships that comes with commitment rather than avoid it and miss out on the opportunity to grow and mature in Christ.
“Let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” Galatians 6:9
Posted in blogging, christianity, faith, family, marriage, Non-Fiction, writing
Also tagged Anxiety, Children, commitment, Family, Fear, Growth, hardships, Jesus Christ, Marriage, Maturity, responsibility, struggles
Leave a comment
Redeeming Lost Time
I was speaking with my therapist last week about choices. I was explaining why certain things didn’t happen in my life and what occurred and why it lead me to where I am today. There was a significant amount of loss.
The topic came up because I was rehashing what happened in my writing group. I had submitted a piece I had worked on for critique. What usually occurs is everyone gets a turn telling you what they liked or disliked or what worked or didn’t work for them. I struggle with getting critiques because I’ve been criticized for most of my life.
My therapist explained my writing isn’t me. Meaning, they are not critiquing me as a person, they are only critiquing my writing. But I responded that my writing is me.
It’s the same thing when I cook. I like to cook and feed people. When I cook, I cook from my heart. It’s an act of giving. My cooking is an expression of who I am. So, if someone doesn’t like my cooking, I take it personally. Just like I do with my writing.
I gave my therapist a time table of every creative endeavor I’ve pursued since I was a teenager. I had the same issue with each of them. First, it was acting, then fashion design, then singing, and then writing. In that sequence.
I get the fact that we need critiques to improve and grow. However, I can’t help it if I struggle to the point of giving up. I’ve repeated the same pattern throughout the course of my life. I’m tired of this cycle and getting nowhere.
Here I am at 53, and in the same position that I was in my 20’s. It’s kind of sad actually. The Lord gave me creative abilities for a reason and I’ve allowed fear and people’s words to stop me.
My therapist is astute and asked me one simple question. “Are you trying to play catch up and make up for lost time?” I sat there and thought about it, and realized the answer is yes. Now I understand where all this pressure is coming from. I’ve made so many mistakes in the past that now I’m afraid to fail.
I have to remind myself that I wasn’t meant to be perfect in the first place. I can and will make mistakes in my life and writing. I can give myself permission to write crappy, make mistakes, and even fail. Failing isn’t the worst thing that can happen to me or you because that’s when we learn the most and can become better.
This quote by Anne Rice resonated with me this week, “To write something you have to risk making a fool of yourself.” So true.
We have to risk making a fool of ourselves. We are ever evolving as people and as writers. There is always something new to learn. We won’t stop learning and growing until we die. That’s if we allow ourselves and don’t give up.
I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of fear and people kicking me in the butt. The past is the past. This is the present. I don’t have to play catch up and try to redeem lost time. I can start from where I’m at and give myself permission to learn, grow, make mistakes and even fail. I hope you will do the same.
Posted in anxiety, blogging, writing
Also tagged Acting, Afraid, Aging, Anne Rice, Blogging, catch up, Cooking, Creativity, Critique, Critiquing, failing, Failure, fashion design, Fear, gifts, God, Growing, Identity, Learning, Lost time, Mistakes, past, People, present, pursuing dreams, redeeming, redeeming lost time, Singing, therapist, Therapy, Writing
Leave a comment
His Eternal Well
“And he must needs go through Samaria.” John 4:4
This verse jumped off the page recently. I thought about how Jesus went out of his way to meet the Samaritan woman.
Samaritans were mixed; half Jewish and half Gentile. The Jews had no dealings with the Samaritans, they were rejected. So, not only was Jesus going out of his way to meet a Samaritan, but he was also going to meet a woman. And not just any ole woman either.
Image: “Jesus, Mary Magdalene, and Martha at Bethany” by J.J. Tissot – Courtesy of Brooklyn Museum: https://www.brooklynmuseum.org/opencollection/objects/13433
In verse six, we see Jesus is weary from his journey and sits on Jacob’s well. When the Samaritan woman appears to get water.
In verse seven, Jesus asks her for a drink.
She responds in verse nine, “How is it that thou, being a Jew, askest drink of me, which am a woman of Samaria? for the Jews have no dealings with the Samaritans.”
He responds to her in verse ten, “If thou knewest the gift of God, and who it is that saith to thee, Give me to drink; thou wouldest have asked of him, and he would have given thee living water.”
He goes on to say in verses thirteen and fourteen, “Whosoever drinketh of this water shall thirst again:
But whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life.”
She asks him for some of this water. And then the zinger comes in verse sixteen when he says, “Go, call thy husband, and come hither.”
She stops dead in her tracks and tells him she has no husband.
He responds by saying she’s correct, that she has had five husbands and the one she is with now isn’t her husband either.
I chuckled at verse nineteen, when she tells Jesus, “Sir, I perceive that thou art a prophet.”
********
I absolutely love the fact that Jesus didn’t allow the customs or prejudices of that time stop him from changing His course to go speak to her. It was a divine appointment. He didn’t judge or shame her. He basically let her know that these men she keeps sleeping with aren’t going to satisfy her. They aren’t going to be able to nullify the emptiness or fill the void she feels with sex. Jesus knew her pain and made it a point to go out of His way to help her; a Samaritan, woman and prostitute.
The religious folk couldn’t understand Him. They judged him for talking to sinners like her. But it didn’t matter what they said to Him or accused Him of, He knew her heart and He wanted her to know that He is what she’s searching for.
Today many are thirsting and trying to fill their void without Jesus. They are rejecting God which is why things are getting worse in our country and around the world. The more society shakes their first at God and rejects His Son Jesus Christ, the worst things will get.
Like the Samaritan woman, He comes to all of us offering living water, the question is will we drink from His eternal well?
Posted in anxiety, christianity, faith
Also tagged Christianity, Christians, Church, Living Water, prostitute, salvation, Samaritan Woman
Leave a comment
A Loss For Time
I never thought about time the way I do now. Before becoming disabled, my days lead into the next without much thought of what awaited me.
I was once healthy, active and strong. I took pride in my ceaseless energy and workaholic ways. I felt like I was on top of the world. Never did I imagine my life would take the turn that it did and I would be faced with limitations.
On dealing with relentless health issues and that of my children, I was smacked head on with my own mortality and a loss for time.
Photo by Fredrik Öhlander on Unsplash
We all want time to stand still, especially when life is good. We live in the moment and relish it for what it’s worth, believing it will last forever.
I can assure you, I never imagined being in the situation I am today. If someone would have told me this when things were going well, I would’ve scoffed and laughed in their face.
But here I am, facing what is, as time ticks by and I can’t get one second of it back.
When I was forced to slow down due to my illnesses, I was faced with time. Time I once had and squandered. Time that’s left which I bargain with God daily and beg Him not to take me too soon. More so, for my kid’s sake, not so much for mine.
Well, perhaps a little… as I think about all the time I’ve wasted when I thought I had plenty of time.
The Bible says it best in James 4:13-14:
“Go to now, ye that say, To day or to morrow we will go into such a city, and continue there a year, and buy and sell, and get gain:
Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away.”
Yet, there is this part of us that thinks we aren’t going to die, that we will live on earth forever. Until we are reminded, through sickness or an untimely death of a loved one.
I’ve contemplated all the time I’ve literally wasted, never once thinking I’d be in the position I’m in today. I took my health, energy and vitality for granted.
I also had plans.
For one, I was going to retire at my previous job of 23 years. Never thinking I’d ever become disabled and unable to work anymore. That wasn’t something I thought was possible and was the furthest thing from my mind, too.
Yet, here I am… dealing with one health issue after another for the past three years and things only seem to be getting worse instead of better.
However, I’m not writing this to depress you. The purpose of this post is a reminder that life can change in a second, minute, hour, or day. You can be fine one minute and get hit with something the next. Life–as you know it–can radically shift in a blink.
We never plan for stuff to happen. It’s not in our control. The only thing in our control is today. If you have God, your health and mental faculties, then as Benjamin Franklin quoted, “Don’t put off for tomorrow what you can do today.”
Wise words which I would encourage you to heed.
Please don’t wait until you retire to pursue something you’ve always wanted to do. A dream you want to pursue. A place you want to visit. Make a plan and do it, don’t wait.
There is a loss for time and once it’s gone, you can’t get it back. Take advantage while you still can.
Posted in disability, Medium, writing
Also tagged Benjamin Franklin, Bible, Book of James, Change, death, disability, Illness, Jesus Christ, Life, Sickness, Time
Leave a comment
A Slow Death
As I gazed at the landscape that was once plush green, thoughts ricocheted like bullets in my mind.
I wondered how leaves changed from being green to brown, orange, red and yellow.
They change and transform by a slow death.
Courtesy of Creative Commons
The result is from the breakdown of chlorophyll, due to the changes in the length of daylight and temperature. The leaves stop their food-making process. The chlorophyll breaks down, the green color disappears, and the yellow to orange colors become visible and give the leaves part of their splendor.
God is the master artist weaving a beautiful tapestry in nature with the ebb and flow of leaves, seasons, tides, births and deaths.
Watching the leaves turn reminds me of God’s power and my fragility, His strength and my weakness, His immortality and my mortality.
In reality, we are all fallen leaves, dying a slow death.
“For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away.” James 4:17
Posted in blogging, Medium, spirituality, writing
Also tagged Autumn, death, God, Jesus Christ, Leaves, Life
Leave a comment
Blind Spots
One of the biggest challenges for Christians is the ability to see themselves. It reminds me of the blind spots while driving.
Blind Spot by Nimish Gogri | Creative Commons
Blind spots are areas of the road (or vehicles) that cannot be seen while looking forward or through either the rear-view or side mirrors.
What do I mean by blind spots in our Christian walks?
Here are some examples:
Example 1: A father who has been a Christian for many years, graduated Bible school, did missionary work and is a worship leader. He is known to drop everything to do “ministry.” Yet, when his son was down and out, lost his license and vehicle due to a DWI and needed a ride to work, his father told him that he couldn’t give him a ride because it was too much for him.
Example 2: A woman receives a negative health diagnosis and is waiting to have a procedure done. She is alone and anxious. She decides to text a sister in Christ and ask for prayer. She never responds. The following day she texts her again to ask if she had received her text. She responds by saying yes, but that she didn’t have anything to say.
Example 3: A son gets kicked out from where he was living. For all practical purposes, he is homeless. He reaches out to his father and asks if he could stay with him temporarily until he can get himself together. His father says, No.
All three people are believers, who are either doing ministry or serving the Lord. However, when the rubber meets the curve (I’m trying not to use cliches, lol), their words and actions are incongruent. There is a disconnect.
This is what I refer to as blind spots and what others call hypocrisy.
Blind spots are deceptive, dangerous, and destructive. We all need to face the truth about our blind spots. They need to be dealt with, and not ignored, denied, justified, deflected and excused.
How do we face our blind spots?
- By accepting that we have them.
- By praying, repenting and asking God for awareness, assistance and forgiveness.
- By reading and studying the Bible daily, which helps in examining (2 Corinthians 13:5), and judging ourselves. (1 Corinthians 11:31).
Thank the Lord for your truth, love, forgiveness, mercy and grace.
“Amazing Grace, How sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost, but now am found
T’was blind but now I see”
Posted in blogging, christianity, faith, forgiveness, prayer
Also tagged Blind Spots, Change, Christian Walk, Consecration, Growth, Jesus Christ, Maturity, Sanctification
Leave a comment
KJV Know The Word Study Bible
Paperback: 1824 pages
Publisher: Thomas Nelson
Price: $27.99
Purchase: Amazon | BN | CBD
Description
The KJV Know the Word Study Bible offers three easy ways to begin studying Scripture and helps individuals transition from being a casual reader of the Bible to becoming a regular student of the Bible. You can choose to study the Bible book-by-book, verse-by-verse, or topic-by-topic; each path offers powerful insights that will help you develop a daily routine of Bible study. The book-by-book series of notes leads you through the main points of each book of the Bible. The verse-by-verse notes help you to dig deeper into God’s Word. The topic-by-topic articles, which cover 21 theological topics, guide you through a series of insightful notes and give you a thorough biblical understanding of each topic. With the beautiful and timeless text of the KJV translation, the KJV Know the Word Study Bible offers you choices of how to study Scripture and grow in your relationship with Christ.
Features Include:
- King James Version Bible text
- Three easy approaches to study the Bible: 1. Book by Book; 2. Verse by Verse; 3. Topic by Topic
- Insightful introductions for each book of Scripture
- Words of Jesus in red
- Beautiful two-color interior page design
- Comprehensive list of theological notes
- Concordance
- Full-color maps
- 8-point type size
Review
I love Bibles, and my favorite version is the King James Bible. So, I was eager to review Know The Word Study Bible.
The pros: I liked the book by book, verse by verse and topic by topic sections, and the fact that it is compact enough to carry around with you. My personal favorite is the Introduction and Notes.
The cons: The print is too small for me and I found it limited. What I mean by limited, is that it’s not like a Life Application Study Bible or ESV Study Bible.
Overall, I like the Know The Word Study Bible and would recommend it. It does offer more features than any other compact study bible I’ve seen. I believe this bible would work best for a new believer as it’s not too intimidating or overwhelming.
Disclaimer: I want to thank Litfuse Publishing Group for sending me a complimentary bible in exchange for an honest review.
Posted in book reviews, christianity, faith
Also tagged blog tour, KJV Study Bible, Litfuse Publicity Group, New Bible, Thomas Nelson, Truth
Leave a comment
Drain The Swamp
Have you ever found yourself in a hopeless situation? A dark and lonely place? Where everything around you lacks color and is grey.
Haunted by memories, hounding you like a hungry wolf. Lost in a swamp, walking aimlessly, looking for a way out.
Courtesy of SJ Carey | Creative Commons
No matter what you do, or how much you walk, you are trapped with no escape. Lost and desperate, you look up and all you see are dead branches.
You look down at the murky water, with the hopes of finding life, only to be met with a distorted reflection of someone you once knew, looking back at you.
* * * * * * * * *
Our hearts are preoccupied with self, and our minds are polluted with the cares of this world.
The swamp is our souls.
“Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.” Matthew 5:8
“And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.” Romans 12:2
How do we drain the swamp?
It’s simple, but requires a commitment. That is, reading the Bible every day without fail. Not only reading it, but praying, studying, journaling and meditating on it.
This is how the excavation begins. The draining, digging, cleaning out of the old and replacing it with the new.
When negative thoughts flood your mind, like a tsunami, and you feel hopeless, think of Jesus.
When the pain suffocates you, and you feel like giving up, cry out to Jesus.
When nothing makes sense, and there are no answers, pray to Jesus.
When you feel lost, alone, and no help can be found, call on the name of Jesus.
Only Jesus can save us from ourselves. He is our only hope in the midst of whatever we are going through.
“Jesus is the way, the truth and the life.” John 14:6
“But rather seek ye the kingdom of God; and all these things shall be added unto you.” Luke 12:31
We must seek Him like hidden treasure.
“Again, the kingdom of heaven is like unto treasure in a field; the which when a man hath found, he hideth, and for joy thereof goeth and selleth all that he hath, and buyeth that field.” Matthew 13:44
Jesus is the answer. He possesses the keys to any problem or situation we face. He alone can drain our swamps and set us free.
***May this song encourage you today: https://youtu.be/ADuWzd7x25c***
Posted in blogging, christianity, faith, prayer
Also tagged Bible, Change, deliverance, Drain The Swamp, faith, Giving up, healing, hope, Hopelessness, New Life, prayer, Renewing our Mind, Transformation
2 Comments
What Side Are You On?
How many times have you heard… “I’m a Christian,” “I believe in Jesus,” “God speaks to me.” But when you look closely, you see no evidence of Him.
Courtesy of Creative Commons
They profess Christ. They pray. They attend church faithfully, or not. They post Scripture memes on Facebook, and have all their Christianese down pat. Yet, somehow, they carry on as if He doesn’t exist.
They live in outright sin, but think because they were born with gifts and talents, that makes them special and gives them license to do whatever they want. No holds barred. Never once bending their knee and recognizing Jesus as Lord.
They have made a god of their own understanding.
For a couple of years, I went in a different direction. I had stopped reading my Bible and attending Church to assuage my conscience. The deeper I got, the more convicted I felt, until I came to the end of myself.
Whatever you let in, or surround yourself with, will influence you.
I had to make a choice, either I was going to do things my way or God’s way. It wasn’t about what people thought of me, it was about what God thought, and I knew what I needed to do. I needed to break away from all of those associations and influences that had me walking the opposite direction.
Bad company corrupts good morals. (1 Cor. 15:33)
Was it easy? Absolutely not, because I am back at square one. I pressed the reset button and started over again. But this time, I’m doing things God’s way.
The Bible is clear, we can’t live on both sides of the fence. Either we are serving God or the devil, there is no in between.
Some “Christians” will justify what they are doing with a million excuses, which may even sound plausible, but they are deceiving themselves.
This world is governed by the spirit of rebellion.
Ironically, the ones with all the excuses, are the first to criticize those who are actually trying to follow the Bible.
One thing is certain, they may be successful at whatever it is they are doing in the world, but there won’t be any evidence of Jesus in their life. Because they are not pursuing Him, they are chasing after their own worldly pursuits. They made their dream an idol.
Personally, I’d rather be criticized and called names, however unpleasant that is, than bear no fruit in my life.
What about you? What side are you on?
Posted in blogging, christianity, faith
Also tagged Christianese, Deception, Discrimination, Division, Facebook, Fake Christians, Fake News, Fence, Memes, Scripture, Wall
Leave a comment
Christianity Today
I don’t know about you, but lately, I see so much confusion within Christianity. What happened to the simplicity of the gospel? Where did it go?
Courtesy of Creative Commons
I was one of those Christians who never read their Bible, but in the past couple of years, I have been reading it diligently. To my surprise, I am slowly becoming aware of things I used to passed over, and not pay attention to.
Some Christians get offended when you speak on various pastors who preach a false gospel. They call you judgmental or negative. However, what they fail to understand is how contrary their messages are to the Bible. And yes, I’m deliberately not calling them out.
What I have analyzed is how certain groups of Christians will focus on key scriptures as their premise or basis of doctrinal belief. When they spout these particular scriptures, it does sound exactly as it’s being conveyed. However, that’s the deception. The scriptures are being taken out of context and not going along with the entire theme of the Bible. This is why I say it’s so important to read the Bible.
There was a time I bought into the lie of seeking Heaven on earth. Where everyone will be as one and in unity. Where there is unlimited grace and favor, no matter what you did. A god who supports gay marriage, adultery, murder, child pornography. Anything goes, because God is a loving God and He doesn’t condemn people to hell.
I’m sorry, but that’s not true. God loves the sinner, but hates the sin. He loves the homosexual, prostitute, pimp, drug dealer, murderer, child molester, and adulterer, but He doesn’t love their sin. He doesn’t condone any of these things that specifically go against His very nature and Word. No, He doesn’t accept it, and yes, there is a hell, and it’s real.
Christianity today is do it your way. Where grace abounds, no matter what you do. A feel-good Christianity, where they worship a Jesus who laughs all the time and slaps you on your back, and says, “ata-boy or girl”.
Yes, God is a merciful, and forgiving God. He rains on the just and unjust. (Matthew 5:45) However, He doesn’t accept everything. We shouldn’t abuse or take His grace for granted either. (Hebrews 6:6)
As Christians, we have to make a choice. Either we are all in or all out, but there is no in-between. He hates lukewarm and spews it out of his mouth. (Revelation 3:16)
What kind of Christian are you?
Posted in blogging, christianity, faith
Also tagged Adultery, Child Molesters, Deception, drug dealer, False Gospel, Fornication, Gay Marriage, Homosexuality, murder, pimp, Pornography, prostitute
Leave a comment
Follow
embodyart