Tag Archives: Overcoming Fear
A New Decade
Happy New Year. I can’t believe we are well into the new year and a new decade.
Right before the new year stuck, the Lord gave me two verses.
Photo credit: Carrie ~ Creative Commons Flickr
“I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:14
“God is with her, she will not fail.” Psalm 46:5 (I bought myself a coffee mug with this on it).
I sensed the Lord encouraging me, as if to say, you are entering a new season.
As I’ve mentioned, it hasn’t been an easy few years for me and my family. Not that anything has changed, but I believe I’ve grown in the spiritual department and I’m grateful for that.
It’s not easy to walk by faith and not by sight. I guess the control freak in me wants to know everything before it happens. Don’t we all? But, God wants us to trust Him in all things, not just some, but ALL.
My situation has given me no other option but to trust Him. I mean, my life is literally in His hands. I lean on Him for everything now because I have no choice. I can’t say I’m any less anxious, but I can say He’s been faithful every step of the way.
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Fear has been the biggest hindrance in my life. It has stopped me from many things. It’s been a stumbling block, roadblock and obstacle, especially with writing. I’m aware all writers are faced with insecurity and fear, but many push through it and actually achieve their dreams.
My fear is paralyzing me from actually doing it because I think others are better than I am and who in the world is going to want to read what I write? There are millions of incredible writers/authors out there. Many have Master’s degrees from elite Ivy League universities. I haven’t even gotten an Associate’s degree. So, how can I even compete, not that I actually want to compete, because I’m not the competitive type. But, you know what I mean.
If there is one thing I would want to overcome in this new year and decade, is this horrible fear, insecurity and comparison trap that prevents me from writing.
I also don’t want to continue chasing other things to avoid doing what I believe the Lord has called me to do which is to write. I’ve been running from it and busying myself with other more productive things to do. But, I’m tired of the start, stop, start, stop. I’m 53 and this is getting old already. I don’t want to get to the end of my life and regret never trying and giving it my all.
The fear of failure is so strong that paralyzes me from writing. The irony is that I wind up failing because I give up. It’s a perpetual cycle that repeats itself over and over again.
I don’t believe in new year’s resolutions, but if I were to have one, it would be to overcome this gigantic monster called fear and write no matter what.
What about you? Is there something you’ve been wanting to do, but you’ve stopped yourself because of fear, insecurity or thinking others are better than you are? If so, please comment below or shoot me an email.
Posted in writing
Also tagged 2020, calling, Cycles, Fear, Fear of failure, New Decade, New Year, Success, Victory, Writing
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It’s Hard To Say Goodbye
Do you find it hard to say goodbye? I do.
Courtesy of Celine Shortie – Flicker CC
Lately, there are so many changes happening, and with those changes, goodbyes.
The changes are occurring on my job and where I live. I’m having to say goodbye to people I have known for a long while.
I’m not good with changes or goodbyes.
In the days ahead, I’m going to have to say goodbye to a number of people I care about, from co-workers to neighbors.
No, I’m not going anywhere, they are. I’m happy for them, but sad for me.
Change always unsettles me, it challenges my stability. It makes me feel insecure. Especially when I am unaware of what’s to come, the unknown.
There are times when we are forced to say goodbye to people we care about, whether it is for our own mental/emotional health or the inevitable, death.
Those final goodbyes are the hardest.
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2013 has been riddled with change and goodbyes. I’m trying hard to cope, but deep down, I am preoccupied with it all and what’s to come.
I realize we have no control over what the future holds, we only have today, the moment. But in times like this, I seem to allow the moment to be robbed by worry and anxiety.
I know this is something I personally struggle with.
When something is good, I don’t want it to change. I want it to stay the same forever.
There are some that say change is good. I wish I had that perspective. I would get up every morning embracing the day without fear or reservation.
Unfortunately, that’s not how I get up every day. I get up to a torrent of worry. This is my reality, my personal nightmare. With so much change and upheavel, it’s really challenging me in ways I didn’t think possible.
Perhaps in the end, it will all be for the best. Hopefully this upheaval of change will stretch my character and hopefully, my faith. Only time will tell.
How do you handle changes or saying goodbye? Is this something you struggle with too?
Posted in blogging, faith, writing
Also tagged Changes, Personal Development, Saying Goodbye
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Does Anyone Else Want To Overcome Fear?
I don’t know what I was thinking when I accepted Jon Acuff’s Start challenge a couple of weeks ago. Perhaps I was delusional.
He invited over 2,000 people to participate and over 200 accepted. I was one of them.
Each morning I get an inspirational email from Jon Acuff. I start my day off on the right foot, only to wind up with fear… in my face.
Courtesy of PATRICK BOEHNER – Creative Commons
Fear is relentless.
It tells me I’m no good. It tells me I am not a writer. It tells me to give up.
Jon Acuff tells me to punch fear in the face.
So, fear and I start going at it first thing in the morning. I wind up losing time and time again.
Fear harasses me when I wake up then bullies me all day long.
Forget about when I want to write… fear hurls its ugly insults at me.
Fear is a bully.
Friends, I can’t seem to beat fear. I keep trying to confront this bully, but fear keeps winning every time.
I’m inflated one moment then deflated the next.
I honestly wish I can overcome fear and win for once, instead of allowing it to overpower my life.
Ironically, the minute I committed to the Start challenge, my whole world turned upside down.
I don’t want to bore you with the details, but when I tell you this year has been full of changes, it’s an understatement.
They say change is good, but too many changes at one time is not. At least, not for me.
Fear is a torment, it stops my dreams and prevents me from doing anything worthwhile in my life.
Does anyone else want to overcome fear besides me?
Wrestling With The In-Between
I am reading this book which is really provoking me. I’m sure you all heard me speak of Jeff Goins. Well, I am reading an advanced copy of his new book called, The In-Between, which is coming out on August 1st.
I just started reading it and can’t put it down. I absolutely love the way Jeff Goins writes. He is never boring. He also exudes wisdom in his writing. He’s an old soul. I also find myself relating to much of what he writes. I’m not going to give it all away because I want you to read and experience it for yourself. I will also be posting a review when I am done.
He is really making me think. The kind of deep, looking at yourself kind of thinking. I find myself stopping, remembering, and making connections in my own life. This is the reason why I follow his blog because not only is it good writing, but he really makes you think and gives you meat to chew on. I aspire to write like him.
I know, I know, I am not really comparing myself to him although I can’t help but admit I truly wish I can write like he does. But then, I wouldn’t be myself, right?
I go through a liturgy within myself of all the reasons why no one would like my writing. Why would anyone bother reading what I write? There are people like Jeff Goins, Chris Brogan, Seth Godin, Steven Pressfield, and Andi Cumbo. I mean, who in the world wants to read what I have to say?
Which is why I totally feel dejected and rejected when someone unfollows or unfriends me. I get repulsed with myself in the sense that I’m being totally self-absorbed and pathetic.
Why do I want to matter so much? Why do I want everyone in the world to like and accept me? What is this thing inside of me that wants me to be like everyone else instead of being myself, being happy with myself and that being good enough?
I mean, for goodness sake, I’m going to be 47 years old. You would think I would grow up already and display some sort of maturity here? I feel like I’m still stuck in high school, trying to be accepted by my peers. To be in the “in” group and part of the cool clique. I believe this may even be called narcissism.
I wrestle within myself; one part of me says, Who cares what people think about you, your writing, or what you have to say? The next minute I’m licking my wounds from someone unfollowing me because they didn’t like what I had to say.
Jeff Goins says, You don’t write for other people; you write for yourself. You don’t write for accolades; you write because you have to. You see? He’s so smart.
In his book, The In-Between, he discusses writing as a calling. I’m trying to figure out if writing is my calling or not. With so many talented writers out there, where do I fit in?
I don’t have the answer, but despite the resistance to write and publish, I will continue… as hard as it is for me… I will try to be brave and courageous as those I mentioned above and not give up.
What about you? Do you go through this as a writer? How do you battle the resistance and the incessant negative voices?
Posted in blogging, book reviews, faith, writing
Also tagged Andi Cumbo, Believing In Yourself, Chris Brogan, Insecurity, Jeff Goins, Moody Publishers, Motivation, Seth Godin, Stephen Pressfield, The In-Between
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